The best angle from which to approach any problem is the try-angle. ~Author Unknown
The other week I was working with a client who was concerned about something that she had not completed and had made a self-deprecating statement about not having found a job.
“Yet,” I said, interrupting her.
“What?” she asked.
“Yet. You haven’t found a job yet.”
I then asked her what it would be like if she simply added the word “yet” to the end of her sentence.
“I haven’t found a job” became “I haven’t found a job yet.”
“I haven’t lost weight” became “I haven’t lost weight yet.”
She liked the idea of adding “yet” to her statements. The simple addition of the word “yet” seemed to turn something that seems impossible to something possible.
It is these “Aha!” moments with clients that bring learning into my world and create opportunities for growth and development in my life and the lives of my family.
“I don’t understand this grammar lesson in my homework.” my younger son complained last week. I could sense his frustration.
“Yet. You don’t understand the grammar lesson yet.” I said.
“I can’t do an ollie!” became “You can’t do an ollie on your skateboard yet. But look: you can get the board up half an inch off the ground. That’s progress!”
Every time he got frustrated and made a comment, I simply added the word “yet” to his comment.
Adding the word “yet” doesn’t make everything perfect, but it does allow one to pause for a moment and think about it. The word “Yet” can help one from feeling powerless to feeling like they are harnessing in power and control.
We all have an Inner Critic – that inner voice that judges and demeans us – and that Inner Critic is loud, pointing out when we fail. Statements like “I haven’t found a job,” or “I can’t do an ollie!” is just the Inner Critic just doing his/her job.
Perhaps adding “yet” brings down the volume of the Inner Critic and gives a spark so that there is a realization that yes, it can be done and that it is not impossible?
The addition of “yet” to every negative sentence may not always make sense, however, it does seem to halt some of the negative thinking and allows an opportunity for the Inner Champion to come in and give us strength.
The fact that I have a choice in how I respond to my Inner Critic or help my children tackle challenging or frustrating situations makes it nice to have the word “yet” in life’s toolbox.
As of today, my son received an “A” in grammar and is still working to perfect his ollie.
And my client? She started a new job and she’s dropped 27 pounds – that’s better yet!